Would You Jump That Fence?(no homo)

Preface: You might be surprised to find out that this entry has nothing to do with chain link, barbed wire, or Mexicans.

So I had a conversation not too long ago that centered around the song “Happy New Year” by Nat king Cole. As I sat in my father’s living room hearing this wonderful song come through the Bose sound system, I made the following comment to everyone in earshot;

“I would totally do Nat King Cole.”

And you know what I would! For starters he was one handsome ass man, with a devilishly charming smile. He had charisma, he was worldly, and that voice. That smooth, satin voice of his. There has never been another like it! I came to the conclusion that night that Nat King Cole is my fence guy.

Now of course people called me names (homo for one), but as I stated my case everyone understood where I was coming from. The women in the room all shut up because, as we all know, every woman has that one girl she’ll jump the fence for. (Some of you already have!) Now of the three men in the room, two were gay. This left only my friend Alex who afer some hesitation admitted that he would gladly jump the fence for George Lucas. As you may be able to tell, Alex is a huge Star Wars geek .

For the recored I feel much more comfortable having Nat King Cole as my fence guy than George Lucas, because Nat has passed on. Therefore I can rest easy knowing that there is no dude (that I know of) walking this earth who could inspire me to gayness. However, on the off chance that George Lucas meets Alex at a bar one day and pays for his appletini, Alex would be forced to find out what “the force” really means. So I’ll leave you all with this question.

Who would you jump the fence for? (Guys will answer if they are real men!) 

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64 comments

  1. @curtainsopen – what a wonderful first comment for everyone to see Curt. Thanks for that. To answer your question, that is all a matter of personal preference. I for one, am not the catcher type. Now who’s it gonna be for you Curt?

  2. Ha, I’ve an entire list, really. But then. Considering my last entry, I’m sure everyone knows it’s not so much “jumping the fence” as… ha, well. Anyway.

  3. hell my fence has a swinging gate!!lol but yes we all have our crushes………for instance I would do Michelle Rodriguez in a heartbeat!!   And its hot to talk about but if a guy does it then all of a sudden its taboo…………I think its great that you can admit it cuz you know every guy out there has at least ONE he has thought about.

  4. I would jump the fence for Angelina Jolie, Nicole Kidman, and Kira Knightly. Among others. I’ve actually had this exact conversation with multiple of my guy friends, and every guy has a fence guy. Trust me. The trick is just finding out which one it is. 

  5. I’d probably hop that fence for Brad Pitt, but we’ll just have to keep this one a secret. Great post by the way. I got some laughs out of it. 

  6. Nat King Cole is classy.  George Lucas would make me a lesbian.For me, Kate Winslet is my number one.  Eliza Dushku.  Jewel Staite.  Gina Torres.  Rose McGowan.  Yeah, you can see I didn’t really need to think hard on this!

  7. 1st off, I must call No Homo. Then.One time…when I was watching Troy…I thought, dang, that Brad Pitt is the best looking man I’ve ever seen.  He’s better looking than alot of women.That’s as far as I went in my ruminations.  But he sho is a fine lookin man.

  8. Hrm, I don’t know!?!?!?!  Shakira’s really pretty but I wish she had a touch more meat on her.  I’ll go with her anyway because well, you said we had to choose someone.

  9. LOVE Nat King Cole too, btw.  His daughter did a Christmas special years ago and sang Joy to the World.  A performance I’ll never forget.  That’s a talented family whether I sleep with any of em or not

  10. I would have to say(at risk of being made fun of) I have always had a major woman crush on Britney Spears. Even when she went bald and crazy. I would have to agree with Scarlett Johanson, Kiera Knightley, and Jessica Alba also. Britney is my number one though.

  11. I would be cheating on my man if I did any fence jumpin. I had a good friend though who we use to kid around and say that we’d take each other if we ever did. Mostly for our redeeming qualitys and the fact we could both get a job done really well. It had nothing to do with looks.

  12. You know, I can like a lot of girls; but there’s big difference between admiring and having affection for someone and “jumping the fence” for or with them. They just don’t have the *ahem* equipment to make it worth the jump, thanks. And, no, battery-powered appliances do NOT count.

  13. I’m uncomfortable contemplting this, but maybe Beyonce. Jared says “Probably Clay Aiken, but that wouldn’t be much of a leap.”

  14. Ive already jumped the fence seeing as that until I was about 18 I was only attracted to girls. xD now I’m bi.. but I still like girls more. Definitely. However, IF I was straight… I would have to say Audrey Hepburn.

  15. Dude. You had me at Mexicans (totally politically incorrect, and being an immigrant myself I should be ashamed, but…funny).  I’d probably jump the fence for Angelina Jolie…

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