What’s in a name?
After all, a rose by any other name would smell just as sweet… wouldn’t it? (Fasten your seatbelts xanga. I am feelin’ all philosphical right about now.)
Let’s apply this query to the greatest book ever written. I am talking of course about Dr. Seuss’ Green Eggs and Ham. No? Okay let’s talk about the Bible instead. I have often wondered if the Bible would be nearly as good if some of the names weren’t so…well, biblical.
I mean think about some of the names in the Bible. Moses for instance. That is a strong name right there. Moses is the type of name someone who could part the red sea would have. Let’s try on another name for size:
Then the Lord said to
Moses Artie, “Stretch out your hand over the sea, that the water may come back upon the Egyptians, upon their chariots, and upon their horsemen.” So Moses Artie stretched out his hand over the sea, and the sea returned to its normal course.
Hmm. Not exactly the same effect huh? Let’s try some more.
Samson Harold said, With the jawbone of an ass, heaps upon heaps, with the jaw of an ass have I slain a thousand men.
Noah Stew was five hundred years old: and Noah Stew begat Shem Larry, Ham Curly, and Japheth Moe.
Neither shall thy name any more be called
Abram Mort, but thy name shall be Abraham Mortimer; for a father of many nations have I made thee.
Pretty lame right? I know.
How about the star of the New Testament. Would Christianity have been so wildly popular if Jesus had a corny name?
Jesus’ Melvin’s name we pray. – Can you say FAIL! Jesus Randy saith to him: I am the way, and the truth and the life.
Think crusaders would have gotten all amped up to fight with battlecries like this;
JESUS’ FRANCIS’ NAME!!!
I think not!
It wasn’t just people’s names that were awesome. The names of places were pretty cool too. Like Nazareth for example. How would Jesus of Alabama sound? Or how about we set the scene for his crucifixion at Palm Springs instead of Gethsemane?
The coolest names in ome of the people’s names were the names of some of the books. I don’t know half of what is in the Book of Deuteronomy, but if someone quotes it I am impressed just cause it’s from the Book of Deuteronomy. Would the same effect be had if you said I would like to quote the Book of Stuff God Said a Long Time Ago?
Now please don’t misunderstand what I am doing here. I am not trying to mock anyone’s beliefs. This is not an attack on Christianity. I could do it with other religions too if I wanted…
Believe in what was sent down to
Muhammad Reggie– which is the truth from their Lord.
…I am not going to do that though, because this is not about mocking religion. I chose Christianity because these were the stories I was taught as a child. So in posing this question to you I am actually posing it to myself.
So what is my answer? Well you’ll just have to wait and see on that one.