There’s No Room For Fairies Here…

…This is a singing competition after all.

Despite not really paying attention to this season of American Idol, it was hard to miss that Adam Lambert was far and away this year’s best contestant. I heard it at my mom’s house, I heard it at work, I saw it on the internet, I heard it on the news. Hell it seemed a forgone conclusion that he would win.

So I headed over to my mom’s house yesterday to watch the finale (as is tradition) and waited to hear Adam’s name called. As Ryan took the envelope from some English dude we all were talking about how seemlessly Adam fit in with KISS. I mean that’s KISS you’re up there with and you feel right at home. Props on that one Adam. Then Ryan opened the envelope and announced, “Your new American Idol is”…

shocked
Kris Allen? Even he looked like a mistake had been made.

As I sat there watching my mother throw a temper tantrum in the living room, it suddenly dawned on me; He might have been able to make it to the finals, but Adam Lambert never stood a chance of winning this competition. I started to think of some others who would never stand a chance on American Idol.

People Who Would Never Stand a Chance of Winning American Idol

Richard Simmons
RichardSimmons
And that Number 15 guy behind him.

Liberace
Liberace-2
That is a pimpin ass outfit though.

Ru Paul
ru paul
YOU BETTER WORK…Someplace else.

Dr. O’Malley
dr
Don’t give me that sad puppy look. Rules is rules!

Sean Penn
milk
Shoulda never did that movie man.

Clay Aiken
clay aiken
“Ahhhh vagina. Scary!” haha.

Sir Elton John
Sir Elton
Look, I don’t care how many grammies you have or who knighted you. This competition is not for you!

The Human Torch
human torch
Flame on indeed!

So what say you readers? Did Adam lose because he is flamingly gay?

 

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68 comments

  1. That is what I hear everywhere this morning but think about this for a second.  What happened last season?  You had someone who was destined to win.  Then that person didn’t win.  Why?  All the anti-votes worked together.  Adam has a large appeal.  But you also had him looking like the presumptious winner most of the season.  I predicted a backlash a few weeks ago.  The reality is that most of the votes for Allison and Danny went the way of Kris not Adam.

  2. FOR GOD’S SAKE, IS AMERICAN IDOL OVER OR IS IT OVER? FOX TV IS LEGALLY OBLIGATED TO NOT AIR ANY MORE AMERICAN IDOL EPISODES FOR SEVERAL MONTHS. IF THEY TRIED, RUPERT MURDOCH WOULD BE PUNISHED WITH DEATH. So no more American Idol. HUZZZZZZAH! It is now time to blog about- clams! They’re the hot new trend of 2009.

  3. I didn’t follow it that closely either so I can’t really give you an educated opinion on the matter. But I will say this: There isn’t a doubt in my mind that AI might have fudged the numbers because of how Adam might have tainted their image had he won. However, he is a great performer and artist and I’m sure he will go far without AI nipping at his heals. In fact, he’ll probably go further not be affiliated with them. I mean really, look at Daughtry! He was like 3rd or 4th and is a huge star. Just sayin…

  4. No.  I think Kris truly won because overall more relevant to the main music scene.  Adam only knows how to do the “big production” EVEN when it was the more low-key “acoustic” type performances.I do agree though it was way cool seeing him there with KISS!  Freakin’ awesome!

  5. That Picture is Priceless!!!! ROTFL!! Yeah that is why he lost…But who cares…AMERICA he has a deal!!! It is just a matter of time before he has a album and a number one!!

  6. Well, the thing is, he wasn’t really flamingly gay. He looked downright butch compared to early round contestant Nathaniel. That cat was so gay he had peni spilling out of his mouth when he sang. Adam is gay and it doesn’t really matter. All you had to do was bare witness to his incredible gifts. He was amazing. People tune in to see what ADAM was going to do with this week’s song….not to see Kris do Richard Marx’ version of everything.

  7. I have no idea since I don’t watch it. But I just wanted to make a random distinction.American Idol is an idolatry competition not a singing competition. The actual singing is secondary. It says so right in the name.

  8. I don’t know, Dave. Elton John could have had his shot at stardom when he was married to that German chick back in the 80s. Too bad he blew his chance.

  9. He lost because little girls everywhere were more into Kris. Hell, it was seriously amazing that Kris made it as far as he did. He should have been cut a long time ago.

  10. I’m hearing that & all the people that were going to vote for danny probably voted for kris….so, yea, i called it before it even happened.  Took away some money on that bet.

  11. no way.  women love Adam.  it’s not like it matters, since they’ll both make an album, before being in a “where are they now?” edition of Teen People, where all American Idol winners (besides Kelly Clarkson) go.  he just lost… somehow. 

  12. I don’t think he lost because he’s gay. Its irrelevant.  Kris’ “downhome” guy next door attitude just won the people over more than Adam’s over-the-top staging/singing and zebra striped skinny jeans.

  13. Wait, Adam is gay? I just thought he was really into that whole musical theater meets 80s Emo Goth mashup. See, that’s what I get for only watching 1 episode. And I only found out who won when I heard it on the morning this radio. 

  14. I don’t think it has anything to do with Adam’s gender issues. Personally, I think he’s a better singer, but here’s how it went down: The last three contestants were Adam, Danny (Christian worship leader at his church), and Kris (also a Christian worship leader.) When Danny got voted off, all his fans transferred their votes to Kris. And those Christians are a persistent, strong voting block. I know this b/c I am one of them…although, I was for Adam.

  15. Adam’s sexual orientation makes no difference to me.  Would he have sung differently if he was straight?  Of course not!  I do agree that once Danny was voted off, most of his votes went to Kris.  I think both Adam and Kris were good, but I also think that Adam may be better off not winning.  I think he’ll end up with a contract, but he’ll get to choose who represents him rather than being sucked into 19 Productions.  Who’s album am I most likely to buy?  Allison’s!!!

  16. Don’t know. Don’t watch. I go down to the local pub and hear music that I can depend on.  Not this years version of everyones idol.  I like the old guys with experience and soul. Yes, I know there’s room for young new stuff, but they don’t want me voting anyway. It their turn right?  I don’t even know why I’m commenting. I vote for you Dave!

  17. I like how one of your responses to someone was you didn’t care you just wanted to make the list.  I don’t really know how people voted because I didn’t watch idol to know what the deal was.  Your tags let me down a little.  I don’t know what I was expecting, but didn’t get it in the tags. 

  18. I didn’t vote for Adam because I don’t like it when people scream when they sing! I felt that I related more to Kris’ songs… that’s all. Adam is very very talented and I know he’ll probably end up selling a lot more albums!I’m sure seeing videos of Adam humping other guys on stage probably didn’t help the vote count. I’m sure there are many parents who would prefer that wasn’t their child’s idol. If Kris had videos of him humping women on stage, many parents wouldn’t have liked that either. The act is just not one that most parents want their kids to immulate.My 2 cents…

  19. I can think of several reasons besides the one you have mentioned:1. All the people voting for Danny transferred their votes to Kris (both men are from Christian families and have the same wholesome, goody-goody package) which gave him an edge.2. Although Adam is the better vocalist, not everyone is into over-the-top, theatrical performances. An acoustic guitar can be more powerful then astronomically high notes.3. Kris Allen sings the more current songs that most people have in their ipods, making it easier for people to connect to his performances.4. The judges and media have been backing Adam all season, and his voters got lazy while Kris’s voters rallied together to fight for him.5. Kris scored with the younger demographic — the screaming, heartsick tweens who are willing to vote nonstop.Those pictures of Adam kissing another male probably did not help. But it really doesn’t matter. I don’t doubt that Adam will still go on to be very successful. I personally liked Kris just a little more because I prefer the genre of music he is going to put out there as a recording artist. BTW, my mom threw a bit of a tantrum over Adam’s loss as well, lol.

  20. Hubby and I were disappointed that they didn’t paint Adam’s face last night. THAT would have been PERFECT! That, and the win. Too bad. (You know, gay or not–I had myself a little teeny-bopper crush on Adam.)

  21. I don’t really watch the show, but I think both guys are great singers. I also want Adam Lambert to do my makeup once, just for kicks.

  22. I’ll put it this way…I don’t watch t.v. and if I did, it wouldn’t be American Idol.  I had NEVER heard of Kris until everyone freaked out Twittering and Pulsing and Posting last night.  However, I HAD heard of Adam Lambert many, many, many times.  I don’t know that gay had anything to do with it…but something was rigged.

  23. I don’t watch it, but the media hyped him a whole hell of a lot up. Perhaps all the super media attention was what killed him.. I like that the other dude took it out. Nothing like a little surprise to piss off millions of people 

  24. Yes he did, Dave. Any man that wears more makeup than Dolly Parton does not belong…well, anywhere.Plus he’s scary. None of the kids would buy anything of his. He would be broke right away.And don’t even get me started on his wardrobe. I thought Gene Simmons was bad in his full body armor and axe-shaped guitar, but at least he didn’t have these weird metal-mesh shoulder pads on.But yeah, I’m glad he lost. If it was rigged, they did America a favor.

  25. No…it had little or nothing to do with sexual preference. (I didn’t even know till after the vote and people started using that as the reason why). I agree he was the best singer and definitely fit those 60’s rock groups that aren’t appreciated the same now. But we’re comparing apples and oranges. It is not en vogue to scream like Led Zepplin. You had to be from the 60’s to love that. I think there are more people voting than rockers. A lot of the people I talked to hate rock. They didn’t much like Kris, but they hated the black nail polish and demonic eyes when he screamed. They voted for Kris to keep Adam from winning. There were also the ‘tweeners’ who voted. They like cute…and Kris had that hands down. But, who do I think will be the star? Adam.

  26. Mon Dieu, I KNEW this would come up. Adam was the only one that I would have voted for, somewhat on the basis that I fell in love with his voice when he played Fiyero for Wicked in the LA production. Then I watched him perform on Idol…all I could do was shake my head at his otherwordly talent. He has charisma, confidence, and a powerful vocal range. BUT. Those things can also be intimidating. After seeing Kris perform, I could easily see why he had a chance in the competition: because he is someone that everyone can relate to in some way. Guys could probably see themselves being friends with someone like Kris, and girls could seem him as the kind of typical guy that is attainable. Where as Adam only appealed the sequined-dazzled Broadway buffs who know how to appreciate stellar vocal ability, cause he’s is just so much in one package. Also, Adam oozed overconfidence (confidence he had every right to exude…), but Kiris is humble. People can find that easier to deal with.   And honestly, Adam DOES NOT need the title of American Idol. That kid is gonna sell huge, and his talent does not need a crown to prove itself. random mention, that picture of Kris’s face is hilarious. I laugh everytime I look at it.

  27. Pssh. Adam Lambert is waaayyyy better than Kris!I don’t know, but I just feel like Adam Lambert has got what it takes: talent, charm, good looks and impact. Kris was just a pretty face.

  28. No, he lost because he wasn’t the best. Not that he isn’t talent. He REALLY IS talented but Kris sort of outshone him apparently if the votes were in his favor. And his singing did bring me to tears a few times.

  29. Girls do love gay guys. They all think they can be the exception, the one to change him. Kris won because all the gay guys voted for him hoping to change him, and you know gay guys can text in votes like nobody’s business!!

  30. LOL Love the pic of Clay…wow! Hm. I’m not sure but you make a good point…I thought he was a good preformer. but mostly for broadway musicals & such…..However. he did AWESOME with KISS! Which was amazing!

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