This is EXCUSE JEOPARDY!

Don’t ask me what made me think of this. I guess this is just how life feels sometimes.

THIS IS…

EXCUSE JEOPARDY!!!

Alex Trebeck: Welcome back to Excuse Jeopardy. Let’s take a look at our scores. Mitch is currently in third place with $300, Carl is in second with $500, and our returning champ Dave is in the lead with $2100. Dave, you have control of the board.

jeopardy

Dave: Okay Alex, I’ll take Work/School for $400.

Alex: You fell asleep the night before your term paper was due and only finished half of it…
Dave: What is slip the janitor twenty bucks to tell your teacher he accidentally locked the locker room yesterday before you had a chance to get your books out?
Alex: Correct! Pick again.

Dave: Let’s try Wife/GF for $400.
Alex: The two most convenient places to be when your cell phone conversations start dragging on
Dave: What are in a tunnel or in an elevator?
Alex: Right again.

Dave: Let’s stay there for $500.
Alex: And that is our Daily Double! (Pause for golf clap from audience)
Dave: I’ll wager $2000 Alex.
Alex: Alright, for $2000. It is the worst thing you can tell your woman when trying to explain why you don’t want to have dinner with her family.
Dave: (Pauses for dramatic effect.) What is the truth?
Alex: The truth it is, well done! (Pause for another round of applause)

Dave: Friends for $500.
Alex: It’s the last person your friends want to hear about when you are telling them you can’t come out.
Carl: Who is your old lady?
Alex: Glad to see you are still alive Carl. Correct.

Carl: Misc. for $100.
Alex: You run into your pastor at the supermarket and he asks you why he hasn’t seen you at church.
Carl: What is I’ve been volunteering to coach little league on Sundays for handicapped kids in Brooklyn and I’ve been going to the church in that neighborhood while doing so?
Alex: Correct again Carl.

Carl: Misc. for $400.
Alex: You are a black man and you have just been pulled over for speeding. What do you say?
Carl: What is I didn’t know I couldn’t do that?
Alex: Judges? (Carl is denied by the judges and no one else buzzes in.)
Alex: Carl that would have been correct if you were a white man being pulled over, but as the clue specifically said “black man”, the answer we were looking for is “what is I am screwed.” Carl you still control the board.

Carl: Mom/Dad for $300.
Alex: Mom wants to know why you still haven’t found a girl to settle down with.
Dave: What is I just haven’t found a girl that can live up to the type of woman you are yet Mom?
Alex: Spot on!

Alex: And the last clue of the round. It’s who you always pretend to be when the credit card company calls.
Dave: Who is my roommate?
Alex: Another brilliant round for our defending champ Dave. Back after these messages.

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49 comments

  1. haha.  “what is ‘I am screwed.'”  nice.  that’s why everyone should have a law school window sticker, for good measure.  at least it’ll be an icebreaker before you get cuffed.ryc:  nah, just no ideas.  but i’m back with new stuff.  or the old stuff said differently.  let’s be real.

  2. Hahaha! Man, that was too good! “What is the truth” was the best line to me. The icing on the cake is your obvious photo editing skills with the Jeapordy board.

  3. Dude. I am so the teacher who would shrug at you and say “too bad. You should have thought about that before putting them in the locker room.” Points off. Sucks to be you. (I am a jerk!) This was funny! Thanks for brightening my day!

  4. Carl that would have been correct if you were a white man being pulledover, but as the clue specifically said “black man”, the answer we werelooking for is “what is I am screwed.” Carl you still control the board.lol you just made my day so much better by making me laugh, thank you 🙂

  5. I just love jeopardy mornin glorie…Carl: Misc. for $400.Alex: You are a black man and you have just been pulled over for speeding. What do you say?Carl: What is – Hey this is not my car

  6. @GodlessLiberal – lol. I have done that once. But it was really an accident. My prof wasn’t hearing it.@UpsideBanana – My mind wanders alot.@mr_randyc – thanks dude.@trynstopme – yeah I wrote it. lol.@elelkewljay – You never know when it might come in handy.@Kalligenia – lol. SUCK IT TREBECK!!!@raiderjester – Carl just doesn’t know black people.@StewieIsMyHero – Hey I tagged you on my entry for today. You are in the song.

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