Living in Denial

It’s like a prison really.

It’s like trapping yourself and those who love you in a prison. The longer you let the sentence carry out the thicker those bars get. You are the only one who knows how thick those bars are getting. You see them close in on you every day. Others who are affected can’t see them. They are blissfully unaware, yet you know. You know and you do nothing.

You feel empty inside. You just can’t find the courage to face yourself as yet. Can’t find the heart to tell those who love you the truth. You even go so far as to tell yourself that you are protecting them by keeping up the charade. After all, it is more convenient to believe this. More convenient than admitting how selfish you are. Easier than saying you are a coward. A much better alternative to the truth.

Then you get to a point where a choice must be made. A point of no return. Either you continue the lies you are living and betray your true self, or you unveil yourself as an impostor and face the consequences that await you. Face the disappointment in the eyes of those who love you. Face the hurt that you put them through. Face having to slowly earn their trust again, or even the possibility that you’ve lost it forever. Which path do you choose? Do you choose the truth or do you choose the lie?

The truth shall set you free, but it also hurts…

…be brave.

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24 comments

  1. Being true to who you are and facing the consequences is actually great at first, there is a huge weight lifted, but in that truth you lose, and sometimes those losses are hard to grieve. However, I do know that the other side of the journey is respect for yourself and pride in who you are. It’s worth it, but not as easy as one might think.

  2. This is an interesting post . . . I know so many people who have become shadows of themselves simply because they cannot face truth . . . these are not stupid people, they’re not people without support networks . . . they’re just too damn afraid.

  3. Living in denial is such a horrible way to exist. Better to bring the truth to light than to live a life of lies. The more one tells, the easier those lies become. Soon, it will be difficult to know reality from untruths.

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