Judge Me Not by my Cereal

So I am sitting at my desk this morning, minding my own business, when a co-worker walks by and pauses to watch me pour myself a bowl of cereal.

“Hey Dave”

“Yeah whatta ya want?”

“Are those Trix you’re eating?”

“As a matter of fact they are.”

“Yeah but aren’t those for… y’know…aren’t they for…”

“Yes, as a matter of fact Trix are for kids, if that is what you are getting at. What is your point exactly?”

“Ahh nothing. Take it easy man.”

As he walked away I could tell he was passing judgment on my choice of breakfast cereals. What kind of grown man openly eats Trix? In the workplace no less? Responsible adults with ambitions and aspirations of climbing the corporate ladder do not eat Trix in the workplace. What does Trix say about you as a person? It says, β€œI am between the ages of 4 and 12, and I am hungry.”

I suppose if I wanted to make a better impression I would choose my cereal more wisely. I could let my co-workers know what a special guy I am by eating Special K. I could openly brag about my mental prowess by choosing Smart Start. Or if I wanted to be non-threatening, I could show them that I am just a “regular” guy by eating some good old fashioned Raisin Bran. (Mmmm, loose bowels!)

But no, I eat Trix. I eat them openly and without shame. You know what my Trix cereal says about me? It says here is a guy who is not afraid to show his love of delicious cereals. It’s why I will continue to eat Frosted Flakes in the workplace. Because they are great. It’s why I will never be afraid to pour myself a bowl of Lucky Charms, which really are magically delicious. Or maybe the Apple Jacks folks said it best for me and guys like me all over the world…

…”We eat what we like.” 




  1. Children’s cereal is invariably nicer then adults cereal. I hate all that bran crap and whatever else it is that supposed grown-ups eat. They are only eating it because they think it will make them look more mature. I always eat the children’s stuff and I’m proud. Luckily for me I work with children so I can get away with all my childlike attributes.

  2. He’s insane. Trix are delicious! And who cares if you like feeling like a kid when you eat your breakfast cereal? Power to you, man.Though Cap’n Crunch kicks some serious Trix ass, in my opinion. But Lucky Charms will always be the greatest of them all.

  3. If I eat cereal, it’s most likely Grape Nuts. Very sweet cereals stopped tasting so great for me during my teenage years. But that’s me. If you still like Trix, then so long as it’s fortified with 12 vitamins and minerals and made with whole grain, who am I to judge?

  4. (standing in front of a burnt out slave cabin, sun setting behind me, fist upraised) As Gawd is mah witness, Ah’ll NEVAH be ashamed to eat Fruity Pebbles again!

  5. That’s so stupid. To judge on cereal. It’s food, who cares? Trix are for kids…they’re for all people. ^_^ Plus I don’t like Special K and smart start. I like Honey Bunches of Oats, Frosted Flakes, Cocoa Puffs and the weird ones you get from Whole Foods Market

  6. I used to hold a spoon like a digger arm  until  some girl pointed it out…  I guess you’ll be eating Alpen  tomorrow…    this made me laugh… that and the thoughts of having to be extra careful not to dribble the milk down your chin.I’m hungry

  7. We eat Trix (even got a tshirt)  We eat Count Chocula, Fruit Loops, Corn Pops and Cap’n Crunch.  If you look at the lables, the Kids cereal is sometimes more healthy than the grown-up cereals.  They also taste better.

  8. i love fruity peebles and have no shame in my game either.. food is food. damnit! its not like u were sittin there eating mashed carrots out a gerber jar… he’s definitely lame

  9. My dad is 50 and he still eats Cap’n Crunch and Fruit Loops, Count Chocula, Boo Berry and Franken Berry and the occasional Trix. But he still likes Wheaties and Rasin Bran but what can I say they’re good and good for you eating that bowl of Trix without shame!

  10. Tell the jerk he’s lucky you’re not eating All Bran or some other horsey food. If you did, it would be a good excuse to go over and shit on his desk.   

  11. I love junk cereal! Cinnamon Toast Crunch is my fav! I love Lucky Charms too, we get the little marshmallows at a bulk food store and add more to the cereal!! Now that is junky!

  12. Nice post! I love kids cereal, we could never afford it when I was kid so as soon as I started doing my own grocery shopping I would buy a different kind every week just to try them. Cookie crisp is my favorite. Of course now that I have my own kid he’s not allowed to eat sugary cereals. I’m sure he’ll rebel when he moves out.

  13. …I’m still kind of confused by the idea of eating cereal at the workplace desk. Did you rush out without breakfast, or was it just a random mid-morning snack? 

  14. I have to have my cereal in the morning. My favorite is Fruit Loops. Next is Apple Jacks. I still have the same two bowls I used as a kid. I stand beside you and announce this without shame, too.

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