This week, young people all over the country are heading back to school. Parents who have been forced to watch Nickelodeon, or Noggin, or whatever other crap keeps their kids’ attention will kick back and enjoy their quiet empty houses. Janitors will once again remember why they hate their lives. Students and teachers will start marking the days till Christmas vacation.
Often times it seems as though that is all we are doing as parents, students, and educators. Counting down. Counting down the days till the next vacation. Counting down the days till the next grading cycle. Counting down the hours till it’s time to pack up and go home. We spend so much time looking at a clock, or a calendar, that we forget what’s going on in the here and now. Essentially, we are on auto-pilot. A fitting environment to raise our children in, seeing as how so many people out in the working world seem to be on auto-pilot as well.
If we are to break this cycle it has to start with our children. It has to start in our schools and in our homes. It has to start right now, at the outset of this brand new school year.
Each year it seems as though things get worse and worse. Test scores are going down, schools are getting more crowded, and every country in the world is getting smarter while we are getting dumber. More importantly than all that though (at least to me), is that every year kids seem to get shittier and shittier.
They are rude, ill-mannered, mean, nasty little assholes. Before we even talk about trying to teach them things like math or science, we need to teach our kids how to be human beings again. We need to fight against this shittiness if we are to have any hope in the future.
This is a huge task and it’s going to take alot of work on everyone’s part to make a difference. As the saying goes, it takes a village. Here are a few ways we can start:
Parents: Stop letting TV raise your kids. There are bad things on TV, like BET, The Hills, and Hannah Montana. I know they are shitty little kids because of the years of neglect you have put them through, but damnit they are YOUR shitty ass kids. Spend some time with them for Pete’s sake!
This is who has been raising your kids!
Teachers: Stop fucking your students. Pretty simple.
Girls: Stop trying to be fucking video hoes. There is no damn future in it. Try being a lady for a change. Do you know where those rappers go when they need some hoes for their video? They go to the damn strip club! Not to a modeling agencey, to a damn strip club! Besides, what do you want to be a ho for anyways. It may get you some attention here and there, but nobody loves a ho (see Hilton, Paris). Everybody knows you ain’t supposed to love these hoes out here.
Boys: Stop trying to be little gangsters out there. Here is a newsflash; about .05% of you who think you are tough, actually are. Quit trying to be some shit that you aren’t. Besides, take a look at the economy. Take a look at the job market. I know this is something you’ve never considered before, but being gangsta is not a very marketable skill. Being gangsta is not going to get you a job with benefits. Just sayin.
Boys: One more thing, wear some damn normal pants. Everything is either hanging way off your ass, or hugging your nutsack. Find a happy medium please!
President Obama: Make it legal for us to beat other people’s kids. PLEASE! Look, we all know that there are some real shitty parents out there. As a result, some of these kids out here are just running around unchecked. We should be able to go upside their heads if their parents won’t. Come on, there is a precedent for this. That is how it was back in the day. Just think about it.
There is so much more to do, but consider this all a starting point. A first step for all of us on the road to recovery. We can do this people. Good luck this year!